If you are reading this page, you’re either my mom (hi, Sally!), or you’ve come across my blog on the magical world wide web by some SEO voodoo I don’t quite understand yet. If the latter is true, then you’re probably already interested in the idea of becoming an “expat” and checking out life in a different country. You may be asking yourself some of the same questions I did when we began our search:
“Is it even possible?”
“Where would I go?”
“Where do I start!?”
The answers to those questions are yes, it depends, and Reddit, respectively. Everyone’s situation is different, but I want to share our experience here in the hopes that it resonates with someone. I want to assure you that becoming an expat IS POSSIBLE and YOU CAN DO IT! We are in the midst of this process right now. It will probably be really hard, which is giving me a lot of anxiety, but we can do hard things…
So, how did we arrive to the decision to move to the Netherlands, of all the countries in the world!? It has been a winding road to get to this point.
A long time ago… (three years ago), we started our expat search by taking a family trip to Canada, specifically Halifax, Nova Scotia and Kelowna, British Columbia. Flying from Kansas City with our 4 month old and 5 year old in tow (and grandparents for help), we spent a couple of weeks falling in love with the summer beauty of the coastal provinces.
We were charmed by the natural beauty and friendly people of Nova Scotia, and when we returned home to KC, started looking seriously at paths to Canadian residency. We read all the books, spoke to an immigration attorney, and looked for jobs. Turns out it is really hard to get jobs in Nova Scotia, and there wasn’t another visa path for us there. Eventually, we decided that maybe Canada wasn’t the right move (and honestly, I don’t think we were quite ready to expatriate). But we were still looking for a change of scenery, lifestyle, and progressive values. So we asked:
“What is the most Canadian part of the US?”
Answer: The Pacific Northwest!
A year later, we moved the fam to Portland, Oregon, where we now reside, and we LOVE IT HERE! We love the wild nature, the old growth forests, the absolutely huge Douglas firs, the majestic solitary mountains, wide blue rivers, and rugged, grassy-duned coast. It is an outdoor playground of epic proportions. We don’t really want to leave this incredible place we now call home. We already did this big move! We already uprooted the kids! And yet…
We don’t feel at home in the US.
This feeling of displacement in our country of origin has been amplified since the start of 2025, and has only grown in intensity, bringing with it a sense of urgency to make a BIG move, even farther away than Canada. So in March of this year, we began a deep dive into our souls and the internet to figure out where in the heck we COULD feel at home.
Where would we feel more aligned with the values of the society around us?
Where would we feel most supported as human beings, now and in the future?
Where could our kids grow up secure, happy, independent, global citizens?
Where would we feel safe?
There are so many amazing places on this beautiful planet, it was hard to narrow it down. We decided to focus on the EU due to its portability between many different countries, and quickly narrowed it down to a few popular expat favorites: Spain, Portugal, Germany, Sweden, Netherlands. We were drawn especially to the Northern countries since we favor cooler weather, efficient immigration processes, and high English fluency. So in June, we happened across a $600 airfare to Stockholm and took it as a sign. My husband, Nathan, was off on scouting trip to Sweden and the Netherlands!
Nathan found Stockholm to be stunning and bustling, and enjoyed Gothenburg and Malmo as well. The Swedish food was delicious (reindeer meatballs, don’t tell the kids!) and the fika culture was lovely, but the natural beauty of southern Sweden was not as appealing as Nathan had hoped (it’s hard to beat the PNW!), and the locals he encountered seemed to avoid eye contact and dress in monochrome (a product of the Nordic culture of conformity). The pathways to residency in Sweden are also not as straightforward as those in the Netherlands, so he was excited to continue on to Amsterdam!
After navigating a train strike upon landing at Schipol (and subsequently 5 hours of bus rides later…) Nathan arrived in the city of Utrecht and immediately felt a connection to the old Dutch style architecture, canals, and friendlier, quirkier, more expressive folks. His text to me that evening read:
“Utrecht is my favorite city so far!”
I felt relief that he felt a connection so quickly. That was the purpose of his scouting trip–to feel that sense of possible home in a new country! He had one more city to check out though, Maastricht in southern Netherlands. Nathan traveled there the next day, and really liked the city, but felt because of it’s location sandwiched between Belgium and Germany, it lacked the distinct Dutch vibe of Utrecht. It was also far enough away from the Randstad (where most Dutch jobs are) that commuting wouldn’t be possible. The job market it Maastricht itself could be okay, but would limit our options. We agreed that the area around Utrecht felt more aligned, being closer to more opportunities for work and connection to fellow expats.
Nathan came home a couple days later, got caught up on some sleep, and the next morning we chatted over coffee, downloading the whole trip. By the end of the conversation, we were giddily hugging and staring at each other with “Are we really doing this!?” faces, ready to begin pursuing our dream to immigrate to the Netherlands! It felt right and Nathan’s in-person impressions mirrored a lot of what we had read and researched about the country. Below are the reasons why we have decided that Dutch life just might be for us, and if you have resonated with anything in this post, perhaps it could be a new home for you, too!
- “Leef en Laat Leven”: Dutch for “Live and Let Live”. They respect and have tolerance for individual freedom of expression as long as it doesn’t harm others. You are free to be who you want to be.
- Due in part to the above societal value, the Dutch have been trailblazers in progressive policies for years. For instance, they were the first country in the world to legalize same sex marriage in 2001. They have also had long standing progressive laws on drugs and prostitution.
- The Netherlands is safer than the US. Gun homicide is 1,777 times more prevalent in the United States than in the Netherlands. Per capita, the numbers are still startling (29 times more gun deaths per capita). Also, the country overall is more bike-centric than car-centric, so pedestrians and cyclists are safer to move about the country through an infrastructure of dedicated bike and walk paths. Fewer cars=fewer automobile related accidents.
- There is perhaps no perfect healthcare system in the world, but the Dutch have a robust system that takes care of their citizens. For example, after every birth, a home maternity nurse is assigned to come help you with your baby and your own healing during the first week after the birth.
- The Dutch are pragmatic, efficient, and direct. I appreciate this (especially as we begin navigating the visa application process!) and also recognize it may be a while before I am used to the Dutch directness after 40 years of navigating small talk and passive aggressiveness in the US.
- There is a lack of elitism and competition that starts in the schools. All Dutch schools are free (only International schools charge tuition) so there is no private school bias as students progress throughout their education. If students choose to go to university, it is infinitely more affordable than in the US and there is no preferential treatment for jobs if you go to one university vs another. (Dutch universities are state-sponsored and cost on average €2,000 per year, which is probably similar to a year’s activities fees and books in the US!)
- One of the most appealing reasons to choose the Netherlands above other countries with similar values is their unique visa pathway for Americans called the Dutch-American Friendship Treaty, or DAFT. This topic deserves it’s own post which I plan to flush out once we have completed the DAFT process and have successfully landed in the Netherlands! Here is a link describing how the DAFT works. We plan to engage a Dutch attorney to help us apply for the DAFT and determine the type of business to set up.
I could go on! Check out a few other quick links with more reasons to consider going Dutch: Dutch kids are the happiest in the world; work-life balance; public transportation; healthy, active lifestyle; Total Football. If there is anything you think I’ve missed, I would love to hear about it in the comments!
We are really excited about this journey, and hope you’ll join us as we figure it out along the way. I will share our mistakes, lessons learned, and all the photos from our scouting trip coming up in October!
Tot de volgende keer, Bri
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Moving to the Netherlands for a better life
If you are reading this page, you’re either my mom (hi, Sally!), or you’ve come across my blog on the magical world wide web by some SEO voodoo I don’t quite understand yet. If the latter is true, then you’re probably already interested in the idea of becoming an “expat” and checking out life in…